NVC Resources on Feelings
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Tips for the Road Series Tip 6
Ask to Understand
Who does not want to be understood? In Tip #6, Eric shows you how to deepen connection and trust by checking your understanding with the person you are conversing with.
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Trainer Tip: The very process of giving someone space to talk about their issue without our judgment, to be truly understood by us, and to be deeply heard is very healing, enough so that most people will organically find their own creative ways to resolve their issues. Rely on this process and you will lose all desire to fix people’s problems. Try this out today.
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Trainer Tip: We can voice our upset about a situation and still see the higher self in the other person. Honest expression can deepen connection and bring us closer to resolution and connection, when we're not judging them. To know that they're a spiritual being, but think they're an insensitive slob or egotistical bore, is a contradiction. Instead, look for the needs they want to meet. See the spiritual being in everyone—even yourself.
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Trainer Tip: Sometimes when we look to fix someone's problems we think we're doing it to make them feel better, but in reality we are uncomfortable and we want to feel better. Instead of assuming you know what their problem is or what they need, listen deeply. Your listening presence can bring relief to the both of you and provide additional opportunities for healing. And along the way they may find their own way to a solution.
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Trainer Tip: If you are feeling anger, you are experiencing an unmet need. When you recognize it as a warning signal, it can be a life-serving tool.
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We can trick ourselves into keeping the status quo, feeling unworthy, and blocking access to critical awareness necessary that allows for new creative solutions to emerge -- when we think in terms of who has "earned" or “deserved” what.
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NVC Life Hacks 4
Anger
Anger is an emotion we'd often like to disown! Shantigarbha offers us five tips for "finding the life" in our anger, and ends with a short, guided reflection.
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Life Hacks 28
Celebrating Life
Sometimes life gets so busy that even the things you enjoy seem to go by without you receiving that feeling of joy. It's important that even when we are busy to celebrate life to the full. In this month's Life Hack Gesine explores 7 things to keep in mind when remembering to celebrating life.
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Life Hacks 38
The Limitations of Saying "I'm Sorry"
Have you ever said 'I'm Sorry' to someone, only for it to leave you feeling disappointed and lacking connection? In some cultures, saying 'I'm sorry' has become too easy and is used for all sorts of situations. Whether it's just to excuse yourself as you pass in front of someone taking a photo, or if you've truly hurt a close friend. So when we really need to communicate regret, how can we do so in a way that acknowledges the situation and the connection?
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Notice when you start to defend. Is your body tensing up? Feeling desperate for the other to understand you or your intentions? Find yourself explaining your behavior, giving all the good reasons why you did what you did? Trying to convince the other of your good intentions? If so, ask yourself: “Is this what I want to be doing right now? Is this really helping?” then practice one of these eight options.